Published August 2, 2008
When Truth comes
like a black and white checkerboard,
like the painful slice of reality that
grows with every birthday;
When Truth comes
like a slap in the face
with the realization of life's true shape,
once hidden behind the shroud of innocence;
I want to hide beneath the blanket again
and pretend that if I can't see it,
the truth can't see me.
Truth is a potato:
stubbornly ugly, waiting for someone
to change its form.
Many people aren't satisfied with a simple, lumpy root.
To them Truth is something to mash.
Something to dice, slice, and bake
until it finally meets their needs;
so they can hand it to you and say,
"Here is the truth."
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140,561 Literary Works • 673,435 Reviews
Hey Anna,
I absolutely loved this!! It was amazing and stunningly creative. The whole potato idea made perfect sense. It was great! Thanks for the awesome read
-kimberli
Oh wow. That is beautiful. It has such truth to it. I love it. The last stanza was awesome. Your imagery is BEAUTIFUL.
)
I love it. I really can't find anything wrong. (Oh, and thanks for your review on my poem. I loved reading it. You're awesome.
Hi! I'm a big Mary Oliver fan myself, and I guess I can say I'm a pretty big fam of you now too because I really liked your poem here. Let's introduce ourselves: I'm Aussie, and I guess you're Anna, so glad to meetcha, Anna!
On to business. It seems to me like the last stanza, which for convenience's sake we shall call the potato stanza, was too long. i like the whole idea of it a lot, but . . . ooh! Maybe try putting that first, like a thesis question, and then put the other stanzas after it. Or maybe break it up and put potato references (that's weird to say) in the other stanzas, so it's like a running theme.
Also, the blanket stanza kind was kind of crunchy to me. It needs to be smoother. That 'again' really got stuck in my ears. I dunno. Don't let me get you down, this is really top-notch stuff here. i love it. PM me if you have any questions.
See you around!